Chapter 1: Meet Rudy B.
Rudy B. lives in New York City, with his 4 pets: a dog, a cat, a parrot and chicken. His best friend is Paul Jenethy, who is a ginormous 11 year old who has a cow that he keeps on the triangle garden roof.
His parents are in Greenland.
His little sister is named Little Gaba, and she fits into the palm of his hand. When she bites and hits he asks his parents for help. His dad’s name is Iris, and his mom is named Simon.His dad works, and his mom sews strings for the cats to play with. The cat is named Simon Boobop.
Rudy B.’s favorite foods are cold—salad and ice cream. Rudy B’s favorite movies are "Astronauts in Jupiter’s Gas," and "Star Trek." Paul Jenethy’s favorite movies are "Indiana Jones" and "Rayjot’s Dark." Paul is kind of hairy and Rudy is kind of big. They like to eat hot dogs and sushi together.
Rudy B.'s favorite book is Dinosaurs in the Volcano. His only job is to play sports. He likes basketball and football and baseball and hockey and golf. He likes Christmas best because he likes getting grown-up presents like clothes and new gloves and a sweater. His favorite clothes are astronaut shirts and baseball hats and car pants and Batman shoes.
He loves to go to museums in NYC. Especially the Natural History museum with the hanging whale on top and the dinosaur bones.
His favorite music is ballet and rock-n-roll and the song "Back in Black."
The most exciting thing he has ever done was riding on a camel in the desert. The kindest thing he has ever done was to give Gummies to his little sister.
He doesn’t like his grown-up sister so much because she gets into trouble. His bigger sister is 12 years old and her name is Biggest Washta.
Toy stores make Rudy B. happy. He likes to get special grown-up things there. Like stuff like sweaters for his ginormous sister and his smallest sister. Sometimes she gets him into trouble.
He gets really sad when his baby sister has a really bad teeth infection. He doesn’t like witches, ghosts or vampires. Getting new coats makes him very angry.
Mrs. Dracasaur is his favorite teacher because she has octagon glasses. She teaches him about different kinds of food. He doesn’t know what apples or pears or oatmeal or sushi are.
He doesn’t have any toys, only sweaters and other stuff like that.
Last week he made people go wild with his big, loud, honking horn.
Stay tuned, dear readers, for more exciting installments in The Adventures of Rudy B., the Grown-Up Ten Year Old!
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